Sunday, January 21, 2007

SQL Server Doesn't Like Cheaters

I emailed a joke(see below) to some friends and one of them replied: "So what you're saying is that I should take a mistress?"

So that got me thinking, what would SQL say about this? Is mistress equal to mistrust. Well according to SQL server it is, run this in Query Analyzer

SELECT SOUNDEX('mistress'),SOUNDEX('mistrust'),DIFFERENCE('mistress','mistrust')

And here is the joke:

Two Ladies talking in heaven

1st woman: Hi! My name is Wanda.

2nd woman: Hi! I'm Sylvia. How'd you die?

1st woman: I Froze to Death.

2nd woman: How Horrible!

1st woman: It wasn't so bad. After I quit shaking from the cold, I
began to get warm & sleepy, and finally died a peaceful death. What
about you?

2nd woman: I died of a massive heart attack. I suspected that my
husband was cheating, so I came home early to catch him in the act.
But instead, I found him all by himself in the den watching TV.

1st woman: So, what happened?

2nd woman: I was so sure there was another woman there somewhere that I started running all over the house looking. I ran up into the attic and searched, and down into the basement. Then I went through every closet and checked under all the beds. I kept this up until I had looked everywhere,and finally I became so exhausted that I just keeled over with a heart attack and died.

1st woman: Too bad you didn't look in the freezer---we'd both
still be alive.

So what is the point of this all? Well it gives you a reason to run those barely used functions like SOUNDEX and DIFFERENCE ;>

No comments: